Remember how absolutely blessed you are to have this woman in your life? Remember the part she played in getting you on the road you know you were meant to follow? Remember how she looked into your eyes two years ago and you knew you were enough, that you belonged? Remember how much you love her?


Remember how excited you were to teach? How many hours you spent preparing, and how long you had thought about that moment? It was everything you dreamed it would be, remember? Absolutely everything you wanted. 

Remember what it felt like to meet your class for the first time as they trickled in after lunch? How willing and eager you all were to be there and learn together? You couldn’t have asked for a better group of women. You loved every minute of it.

Remember how 3 hours (1st half of class) passed way too quickly and you wanted to slow it all down because the experience was moving way too fast?

Remember how much you enjoyed getting to know them and by the end of the second day you wanted to meet up with them again? I hope and pray our paths cross in the future.

Remember walking back to your cabin with a skip in your step, a twinkle in your eye, elated, feeling like absolutely anything was possible?

Remember the words, if you’re prepared you need not fear? How very true those words are.

Remember how you covered yourself with bug spray because the mesquites were merciless? Luckily the spray Jill let you borrow was the nice smelling natural kind. Thanks Jill.

Remember how you missed your friends, Jenica and Amy who brought you there?

Remember how you sat at dinner long after everyone had left talking with Tory and Thea about photography? What we wanted, possible changes, our goals, and personal projects. You loved how quickly the conversation meandered toward meaningful things. Remember how it felt to walk away closer then when you began?

Remember listening to cute Alena and Maya talking about their recent book publications? They are both amazing inspiring woman.

Remember how Michelle and Jen and Elizabeth and Lauren popped up everywhere? How they were willing to do any and everything for you to make your experience magical? They did so much work before, during, and after to make squam absolutely wonderful. THANK YOU!!

Remember when you walked in on the girls, my cabin-mates, learning to belly dance? How could you forget how effortlessly Fiona was able to do the shimmy.

Remember sitting on the couch crocheting a hat, that ended up way too big, talking to Thea late into the night? How your conversion passed all the niceties, the pleasantries, and went straight inside? How you went to bed feeling like she understood you a little better and vice versa? How you’re convinced you were always meant to be friends. Remember what you love most about squam? How it brings you together, your walls come down, and you leave fuller than when you came.

Remember how your prayer was answered? How He provided the opportunity?

Remember how you only regretted one thing about the whole trip — not taking a photo of your class. I guess I was just too much in the moment that I missed it.

Remember how great it felt to sit on the dock and chat in the sun? How you couldn’t bear to get in the cold water again, but how refreshing it was just to put your feet in? Remember thinking it was a perfect way to spend a carefree Saturday afternoon when all your work was done. You loved watching Cal work and getting to know her and the lovely Jen Gray, Tory, Jonatha, Jessica, Rebecca, and Helene better.


[photo by tory williams]

Remember how Tory and you left to take photos with her film camera in the white bathtub? It was so dark in the bathroom you were surprised she was able to get a clear picture. You still haven’t seen the film, but love the digital ones she took. She has an amazing eye.

Remember how much she loved your home town and how you wanted to take her home with you? How her curly hair matched her happy countenance. Remember days before you barely new her name and now you couldn’t imagine her not in your life? Love this girl.

Remember after dinner playing on the dock with Thea, attempting to capture the fading light and then messing around taking self portraits? You definitely found a kindred spirit.

Remember how great the art fair was Saturday night and how amazingly talented all the artist were? Remember how you wished you could have bought one of each?

Remember sitting in Tory’s room with Thea chatting and laughing while they both packed. Remember how you wished Saturday had not come so quickly, but grateful to have met and had squam to get to know one another.


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Remember walking out of the dock Sunday morning to say goodbye until September, but instead felt compelled to write? You were only okay to leave because you knew you’d be back.

Remember how you shared a plane ride with Helene and she was the last person from squam you got to say goodbye t?

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Squam has this way of opening me in places I’ve been afraid to unlock and filling me up in ways I never knew I was empty. Every time I leave I have always felt a better version of myself — ready and able to face the road ahead.

Go here to see my squam photos in full.